Feeling Happiness Again After A Loss

I am in a wonderful group and this topic was discussed the other day. I wanted to share a couple of  thoughts with our group. Please feel free to post your comments and feelings on the subject. Blessings to all.

It has been told to bereaved moms by many that they will never feel true happiness again. I personally feel that this may very well be true for some, but not others. It could take a very, very, long time --- days, months, or years, but many mothers and fathers find it again. You should not abandon hope and if you do find it there should be no guilt surrounding it. You are honoring your child's life.

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There can be a feeling of guilt that first time we feel happy after a child dies. If the pain lifts does this mean we no longer care so much about our child? At the same time, we know we can't live with such sorrow forever. We need to know we will once again feel joy in life. At times that joy seems like it will never arrive, so I guess it's good to talk with others who have been along the same pathway. We can encourage each other to keep plodding along. I think true happiness is possible but not in the same way we experienced it in the past. Actually, for me, joy is a better word because we can be joyful even if we sorrow. And sorrow never really disappears. We just learn to live with it. We can even be thankful for it. It changes us completely and we look at happiness in a different way. When we can turn to God and thank him for our child and all the sorrow and accept what He allowed, I feel we have reached a point where God can start to turn that sorrow to joy.